Law and Moreno kick things off with another mini state of the union, updating any and all happenings with the site. This somehow leads to some TV Round-Up where we talk Ballers, True Detective, Brink, Ray Donovan, and the Emmy nominations.
Ammon shows up drunk and late and shit starts to kick off when we hit Movie Homework. TERMINATOR GENISYS causes a huge (weird) fight among the boys that ends with Law and Ammon arguing about the factory that builds T-1000s. Moreno wisely walks away. We all feel the same way about the film but have drastically different ratings.
We kick Ammon out because he’s drunk and stupid and head over to Google Voice where we get some Homework assignments, a little poetry slam and a couple quality TV recommendations.
What Did You Watch flows with reviews of ANT-MAN, THE SEVEN FIVE, MINIONS, LILO & STITCH, INSIDE OUT, and a shitload of other TERMINATOR movies.
Get ready to pre-order your limited edition Korn Roadie Ammon Flip Flops. They’re amazing.
This is the last time I’m ever going to talk about my 101 Damnations challenge. I ranked and rated the entire list (right here) and did my best this past week to get out of the darkest place I’ve ever mentally visited. I’ve packed up all the visuals of blood, rape, desecration, and general disgust and stored them deep in the back of my brain. To replace them I’ve went to the one place that feels natural for me – animation.
THE BOXTROLLS
First thing I did was make time for a trip to the theater to see THE BOXTROLLS. I loved it. Laika, as a studio, is still batting 1000. While BOXTROLLS isn’t quite as perfect as CORALINE, it is a minor step up from PARANORMAN in my opinion. All three films are great, and while they’re not quite Pixar yet, I’m already awaiting their next film (either WILDWOOD or GOBLINS). BOXTROLLS is one of those animated films that, at first glance, seems too complicated for kids and a tad too childish for adults. Not the case. Every member of my family, ages 4 to 40, loved this film from start to finish and we talked about it for the next few days. There’s nothing as iconic here as Buzz & Woody or as cute as the Minions so what we’re left with is a perfectly spread out collection of fun characters playing out an exciting adventure. Highly recommended.
SPACE JAM
My home life has consisted of nothing but SPACE JAM for the last week or so. SPACE JAM is horrible. Let me re-phrase that – the humans in SPACE JAM are horrible. Let me narrow that down – Michael Jordan is so bad in this movie I truly believe it affects his legacy as a basketball player. I wish I would have shown my kids more about his dominance on the court before showing them this film. Now he’ll forever be the SPACE JAM guy instead of the greatest basketball player that has ever lived. It’s not just him either. Watching that scene at the end when all the NBA players get their “powers” back is some of the most painful acting to ever exist. Wow, Shawn Bradley can dunk again? He’s seven-and-a-half feet tall. Literally.
BIG HERO 6, THE MINIONS
These are the two trailers on repeat in the house right now, and that’s okay. MINIONS for the kids, and BH6 for Daddy. I have a suspicious feeling I’m going to love this film with a passion. I’ve never read the comic or even heard of it before the first trailer but it just happens to be opening the one weekend in my life that I need to love something wholesome.
TOY STORY 4
I honestly wasn’t as excited as I was expecting to be when I heard this news yesterday. Pixar is a religion to me, and the TOY STORY franchise has everything to do with that, but I can’t help but feel Part 3 wrapped things up perfectly. I mean, PERFECTLY. As a 40 year old asshole, I’ll never truly be able to explain the range of emotions I went through while watching tha film. By the time Andy drives of into the sunset at the end I was a mess. The made for TV short films and theatrical add-ons have filled any void of the franchise over the last few year and left me not craving another film the way I was after TOY STORY 2 (my favorite animated film ever). And then I hear that John Lasseter is directing it. Goddammit. I got to interview John a few years back on the old site with Jimmy O so my blubbering admiration of the man is forever available for anybody to listen to forever. If Pixar is a religion – guess who GOD is. I’m obviously still looking forward to it but I’d easily take something original every year, and beyond.
If you listen to the BingeCast, then you know I like putting together a little impromptu segment called Trailer Round-Up every once in a while… like, every once in a while a new movie trailer comes around and I watch it and want to talk about. This week is no different, but I decided to throw it together in an article because by the time we record again… I’ll likely have forgotten all about it.
FURIOUS 7
I pride myself in being a FAST & FURIOUS connoisseur, as I have seen every film in the franchise multiple times and love every single one of them. The trailer for James Wan’s FURIOUS 7 smashed the internet over the weekend and holy shitballs, consider my mind blown! From the ridiculous action sequence in the beginning (parachuting muscle cars!) ending with Paul Walker hanging off the edge of a cliff on a spoiler, to seeing Kurt Russell and Jason Statham be total and complete badasses, everything about the trailer brought forth what I love about the franchise (racing! scantly clad women!)… and promised to give us a little something different (is vengeance different? I guess it is). Plus, with Vin Diesel gives a couple of speeches (“the sins of London have followed us home” and “I don’t have friends, I got family”) and yet another ass-kicking fight sequence with The Rock (plus mini-gun Rock and breaking cast off his arm Rock), let’s just say… April can’t get here soon enough. I’m in!
MINIONS
DESPICABLE ME is a fun movie–surprisingly cute with heart to match. And those damn Minions are a big part of the appeal… or so I thought until DESPICABLE ME 2 came out. The focus was on the Minions far more than the first movie… and the end result wasn’t nearly as good (or as cute) as you would have expected. Turns out it’s the damn kids in the movie that gave it so much heart, but whatever. Now we have a trailer for MINIONS, the first of the series to focus specifically on the Minions (a prequel to DM and DM 2), and while DM2 left a sour taste in my mouth… I gotta admit, this shit looks pretty goddamn funny. I’m digging the history of the Minions, latching on to the most evil thing on the planet until they advertently mess things up by killing them on accident (the Dracula and the Napolean bits are priceless). Not sure where they go from there in NYC in the ’60s, but… I’m in! Should be a flippin’ blast! Plus, their fascination with Bananas never gets old.
CHAPPIE
Here’s one I knew nothing about until the trailer popped online this week. Then I saw posts about Neill Blomkamp’s new sci-fi robot movie starring Hugh Jackman and all I could think of… where the hell did this movie come from? So then I checked out the trailer and it turns out it’s another movie where a robot shows more emotion than the entire cast of a Michael Bay movie, where the future appears great but has some serious technology issues, and damn it all to hell if I didn’t immediately latch on to Chappie… and want Jackman and his lame-ass mullet hairdo dead. I can already tell this is gonna make just about everyone in the theater cry… and hope for painful deaths to all the humans involved. Looks fantastic–can they nominate robots for Academy Awards? If so, I’d say this one has some serious potential.
I didn’t see the GRUMPY CAT trailer, but I read all about Jack’s take on it HERE and all I can say is… wow. Where the fuck is Dog Spiders already?
My DESPICABLE ME cherry was popped just under a month ago, and while I was late to the party, I thought it was pretty funny… and haven’t minded the fact that since then, my kids and I have seen it three or four times. There’s something innocent and charming about the flick, underneath all the layers of evil… and of course, never underestimate the power of the Minions, who literally steal every scene they’re in. Least to say, my excitement for DESPICABLE ME 2 was climbing as the weeks have gone on, and I’m happy to say that I wasn’t disappointed! DM2 is one funny ride full of even more Minion madness than ever before!
So what’s the dealio with DM2? Here’s what IMDb says: Gru is recruited by the Anti-Villain League to help deal with a powerful new super criminal.
DM2 is, in many ways, exactly like DM. The same level of comedy (poop and fart jokes galore, but plenty of adult humor to make it funny for the parents, too. Though, let’s be honest… you’re never too old for poop and fart jokes), the same level of innocence (thanks to the trio of girls), and the same super-spy stuff filled with gadgets, gizmos and typical “good guy vs. bad guy” scenarios. The main difference here is, knowing that the Minions stole the show and were the sole reason for the success of DM, they pumped DM2 with even more Minion shenanigans. And this, my friends, is what makes DM2 a watchable and mostly enjoyable ride. Those Minions are fucking hilarious!
The animation is great (same as before), and I’ll be honest here… the 3D is pretty awesome. I usually take a huge dump all over 3D, but for DM2, it works. Because it’s animation, it inherently looks better than live-action 3D ever will, but more importantly, the filmmakers seemed to “get” how to use the 3D effectively, which for a movie like this, means they know that 3D is just a gimmick, and they execute accordingly. So there’s plenty of stuff flying at the screen, there are plenty of cool camera tricks along the way, and you even have a scene in “evil Minion vision” which was both funny and imaginative. Plus, the post-movie 3D shtick produced one of the best 3D effects I’ve seen since AVATAR, featuring a Minion blowing bubbles at the audience, and I shit you not… it had me reaching out to grab a handful, it looked that fucking good.
There’s not a whole lot to fault DM2 for, except for this: it’s a little too much like its predecessor. I’m not saying this is this year’s THE HANGOVER PART II or anything like that, as they’re different… but there are a few too many familiar scenes and plot points going on, giving off that “been there, done that” vibe. And while I think the music choices were great in DM, they use all the same music in DM2, which is a little weird. They switch it up towards the end (music wise), but they more or less stick with the same story format as the first. Sure, why fix it if it’s not broken, but… still.
On the other hand, it featured a love story between Gru and Special Agent Lucy Wilde which was, in all honesty, quite boring. This is a kid’s movie, no? No kid wants to watch a love story like this, which feels slightly cheesier and less likeable than your typical Disney movie romance. So where the first one excelled in the development of the parent/child relationship, this one flounders with the romantic relationship angle. They could have had Wilde strike up a bond with the girls, but… they don’t. And it’s the little things here and there much like this that makes DM2 a less than perfect movie. The villain (El Macho) is funny, but maybe not as funny as Vector, and the overall evil plan of world domination is pretty weaksauce. Basically, the story here is forgettable and ho-hum, but since most people are going for the Minions, it’s a fault that can be overlooked.
DESPICABLE ME 2 is a funny ride that’s thoroughly entertaining from beginning to end, and is almost a must-see in the theaters due to the 3D. Fuck, I can’t believe I just recommended the movie in 3D, but there you go. The Minions are in top form here, and the goofiness that ensues is both charming and hilarious. I fuckin’ want me a trio of Minions running around my house, doing all the chores, and getting drunk off of ice cream, as I wouldn’t need anything else in life. They’re that awesome. But the story is forgettable, and unlike other animated movies of this caliber, there is no take-home message for the kids in the audience or for anybody really. So where MONSTERS UNIVERSITY excelled in telling kids perseverance and drive can take you places in life, this tells the kids nothing other than Minions are fucking hilarious.