Very little movement across the board this week but news out of the Toronto International Film Festival has promise for some future nudity points. Apparently EX MACHINA starlet, Alicia Vikander, is at it again by getting buff in THE DANISH GIRL. I can’t add the points until the film officially gets released in November but just wanted you to know. We are all smarter today for knowing this. Hit the link below for the entire sheet.
After careful consideration I have decided to give points to Gwendoline Christie for the following Empire cover.
At first I was going to deny this shit but after thinking about it for a while, she is the only person anybody thinks about when seeing the character. She might not be the actual actress in the costume for the picture but she has most definitely had enough impact to allow me to connect who’s in there.
Daisy Ridley also scored an Empire cover so we have now officially entered the STAR WARS points portion of the contest. Move out tha way! Otherwise, very little box office points, no nudity, and blah blah blah. Click the link below for the entire spreadsheet. Or don’t. That’s on you.
I think everything is updated and perfectly lined up with all box office, nudity, and award nominations. If it isn’t, shut your whore mouths. I mean, let me know and I’ll get it to PJ the Intern as soon a humanly possible (when I remember) and we’ll fix that up for you. Until then you can click on the link below and check out the entire spreadsheet in all it’s glory.
Fantastic Four gave you some points, but it wasn’t the points you were hoping for. Watch for a quick exit out of the top ten and a bunch of cursing draft participants. That’s the way it goes, boys and girls. There’s a long stretch coming up with little-to-no box office points coming in. Hopefully we get some magazine covers and nudity in the meantime. Speaking of nude boobs, Lizzy Caplan whipped them out for the first time this season on Masters of Sex. Congrats.
The great PJ, intern extraordinaire, has made some key updates to the Fall releases as we gear up for the end of Summer. He also updated the Emmy nominations. Best intern ever. Lots of points to be tallied for these last two weeks so check out if your ladies have moved up or down the list. As always, you can click the link below and see the entire spreadsheet which features who’s got who and when they’re doing what they do. Plus all the magazine cover points and all that crazy shit. Way too much typing. Bye.
Yeah, I was on vacation last week. What of it?!? So angry and defensive, the world I live in. We got a couple covers this week and lots of box office to look upon. So look upon it. As always, click the link below for the whole spreadsheet and get off my back. Jebus.
Moreno is joined by Supka and Ammon, fresh off a camping trip that led to chasing Bigfoot and raccoons. Jim Law is still on vacation and probably missing in Legoland. So it’s time we step up our game.
The boys start things off on the Literally Literary tip, with Ammon finishing Wayward Pines, Supka reading the Tony Iommi biography Iron Man: My Journey through Heaven and Hell with Black Sabbath and Moreno starting Dark Places. Then they all jack it in anticipation for Ernie Cline’s next novel, Armada.
TV Round Up has Ammon and Moreno being let down by True Detective 2, Supka has problems with the third season of Orange is the New Black, Moreno praises the Amazon original series Mozart in the Jungle and Ammon loves Ballers on HBO.
Google Voice is drunk and Supka is high as balls. Things don’t go well.
What Did You Watch has the boys reviewing the Neeson vehicle Run All Night, The Babadiiick (again), Beyond the Reach, Maggie, The Derelict and Batman & Robin.
Once upon a time I was bitten by the creativity bug and I believed I was put on this earth to make movies. Turns out, I fucking wasn’t, but that’s fine. I’m where I am today, in a great place, due to the support of family and friends like you fine readers, and that’s all good, but picture, if you will, a young 18-year-old die-hard Tarantino fan trying to film shit with his buddies in the most moronic ways. Lucky for you readers, that dream can become a reality because I have unearthed some of my old film projects. I chose three of the more notable ones because to take you through every single piece of the puzzle would be exhausting and most likely embarassing. None of them make any sense, but for today’s article I wanted to walk you down memory lane, to a simpler time. A time before Babdiiicks and Tom Brady man-love (obviously).
Crossfire
Did I mention before that I was a big Tarantino fan? Well I still am, but back in my younger days Tarantino was the end-all-be-all filmmaker for me. Pulp Fiction was a huge source of inspiration and my fandom of Tarantino’s flicks led me to making this short trailer. When Grindhouse was in theaters, there was a contest to make the best grindhouse-esque trailer possible, the winner of course ended up being Hobo With A Shotgun (and we all know what happened there). Me, being the naive asshole that I was, had no idea what a grindhouse movie was, but we gave the trailer a shot anyways, because at the end of the day what would we have to lose? What you see above was the trailer. Yes, we kill my buddy at least four different times throughout the trailer and yes, the editing switches aspect ratios, but god-damn it this was a fun trailer to shoot and I still love watching it.
Super Bowl Ad
Further on in my early filmmaking career (career? hardly, fucking narcissist…) my buddies and I teamed up with the then called Karate Werewolf productions to make some film festival entries for the local university’s festival. I don’t think that we strictly adhered to whatever parameters they set for us, but we came up with this overlong punchline for a joke. The filming is what it is, and the editing makes little sense, but again this was another great night that I look back on fondly.
The Test of Time: Four Decades of The Who
This right here, this was my crowning achievement, yet to be topped. You might have noticed in that video there’s a lot of footage spanning an entire career. Well, you guessed it, I didn’t film a single frame of this. However, this was the project that helped me realize filmmaking wasn’t for me, and it was actually in the editing that I really enjoyed myself. This video was born, with equal credit being given to my good friend Bill, out of a need to put something together. We both love The Who, and we realized this was a great song to make this sort of video for. Six years after we finished it I’m still proud of the job we did. Yes, the video quality is terrible in some areas, but we were working with YouTube clips to begin with and I still stand by the fact that our editing was spot on. Hell, this video even got me my current job, so there ya go kids!
Another Jack Attack Tuesday in the bank. That’s right, slingin’ knowledge your way week-by-week keeps me going, so I hope you guys dig this week’s piece. Let me know below and, if you guys have some short films of your own that you’ve worked on, I’d love to see em, so leave a link below. Binge On!
Another week – another new number one movie. There’s plenty of points to go around, boys, so be patient for your time. MovieFreak can shut his whore mouth though. There were a couple mistakes fixed this week as Kristen Wiig was getting somebody else’s points. Cheating bastards. As always, keep your heads up in case one of you draft picks gets naked this year. I watch a lot of stuff but not everything. Shoot me a message and I’ll update accordingly. Other than that, leave me alone. Hit the link below for the full spreadsheet.