What I consider our greatest Angry Drunk Movie Dads episode yet, Ammon and Law force their entire families to watch the BACK TO THE FUTURE trilogy. Is it an amazing bonding experience or have lives been destroyed? They also pick next month’s movie homework, taking into consideration the time of year and recent revelations.
After all that business, the boys start discussing some of the shit that their kids are addicted to on Netflix and stumble upon an actual million dollar idea. It involves YouTube, booze, and toys. See you at the country club, bitches. Check out one of the videos Law is talking about below and hate yourself for not doing that for a living. Also check out the little kid at the end of BTTF III pointing at his wiener during the final scene.
Sunday night is Oscar night and if you’re a movie fan, it’s kind of a big deal. Not to say that the year’s Best Movies are necessarily represented (The LEGO Movie???), but I think we can all agree that movies that are nominated, as well as movies that bring the statue home, are good movies (except you English Patient, you can eat a Babadiiick! You too, Crash!! Eat it, The Artist!). The Golden Globes don’t mean shit to me, I don’t waste my time with Critics Choice or MTV Movie Awards (some cool categories, but it’s still just a giant suck fest), but I’ll sit down and watch The Oscars each and every year because, like it or not, it means something to Hollywood and the movie business in general. Sort of.
Anyway, I finally caught THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING and can say with a smile on my face, in what may be the first time in over a decade, I have seen every film nominated for Best Picture. It’s such an accomplishment for me that I feel like I should win an award for my efforts. A giant golden statue of a Babadiiick would be the most fitting, I would think. So now that I’m an expert on the nominated movies, here is my take on who is bringing home that bald bastard on Sunday (and I’m not talking about Jim Law).
Best Picture
Who Will Win: Birdman. Hollywood loves movies about themselves. See: Argo, The Artist, Chicago, The King’s Speech (sorta), and Shakespeare in Love (sorta).
Who Should Win: The Grand Budapest Hotel. It’s a film that hits all the notes of entertainment, style, direction, acting, and everything that adds up to equal being a good movie.
Who Might Win: Selma. Just because it got snubbed in every category that it should have been nominated in, it seems like the Academy might make up for it here. Also, if it doesn’t win, they’re all a bunch of racists. Right???
Best Actor
Who Will Win: Michael Keaton. Hollywood loves actors acting like actors. They also love Keaton and who doesn’t love a good comeback story?
Who Should Win: Eddie Redmayne. Dude does an incredible job as Stephen Hawking, not just physically transforming, but doing so with such elegance that you believe he is actually Stephen Hawking . Just wow.
Who Might Win: Bradley Cooper. He’s been nominated hella times and hasn’t won yet. American Sniper is making a shit ton of money and is a hot topic. He also does a really good job.
Best Actress
Who Will Win / Who Should Win: Julianne More. Haven’t seen Still Alice, but if she wins every other Award for this (which she has), then she should probably win this too.
Who Might Win: Rosamund Pike. Ok, she has no chance here, but I would love to see Amazing Amy take home the statue.
Best Supporting Actor
Who Will Win / Who Should Win: J.K. Simmons. See Whiplash. He’s amazing, and if Whiplash takes home just one Oscar, it should be this one.
Who Might Win: Edward Norton. Hollywood loves actors acting like actors. Again, that’s Birdman’s only working angle and it might just take the whole thing.
Best Supporting Actress
Who Will Win: Patricia Arquette. I don’t know, I feel like she will end up the winner, even though I personally don’t think she did all that great of a job.
Who Should Win: Keira Knighley. Goddamn did she rock her role in The Imitation Game. Would love to see her win here, as I thought she did the best overall job. She laughed! She cried! She married a gay guy!
Who Might Win: Meryl Streep. Because Meryl Streep.
Cinematography
Who Will Win: Birdman. For once, not because it’s a Hollywood loving itself thing, but because the whole damn movie is one (semi)seamless shot. Props!
Who Should Win / Who Might Win: Grand Budapest. Loved the switching of lenses and aspect ratios, plus the whole thing looked amazing. And all those classic Wes Anderson tracking shots.
Directing
Who Will Win / Who Should Win: Richard Linklater. He took 12 years to a make a movie, stayed on task, and the end result is a film that never loses its voice. It’s an amazing feat for anyone to accomplish, especially a director as robust as Linklater, who made a ton of other movies in the meantime. Mad props, sir. Mission accomplished.
Who Might Win: Wes Anderson. He has a unique style and does amazing work consistently. Think of this as the Oscar for Budapest and all the other movies he’s made to this point. It won’t happen, but I’d be ok if it did.
Music
I want Hans Zimmer for Interstellar to win. The other films had good scores too, and categories like these are always a shot in the dark, but I’d like Interstellar to win here. Love the score.
Original Song
Again, I don’t know shit about shit. But if “Everything is Awesome” doesn’t win from The LEGO Movie, then everything won’t be awesome.
Visual Effects
Who Will Win / Who Should Win: Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. Those damn dirty apes looked real, were real characters that contributed to the emotional ties that this movie had over its audience, and it was visually seamless. This type of visual effects work has not been done before.
Who Might Win: Interstellar. The space scenes looked like they filmed it in space. Gravity has done this. Apollo 13 has done this. 2001: A Space Odyssey has done this. So that’s what will hurt them (nothing new to see here, folks), but it was still visually amazing none-the-less.
Adapted Screenplay
Who Will Win: Whiplash. The writing in this movie is pretty amazing and much stronger than some of its competition.
Who Should Win: Gone Girl. Ha! Just kidding (I wish). Inherent Vice. As a reader of the original novel, let me tell you… PTA nailed the book better than anyone could have dreamed possible. Seriously, amazing adaptation, and I’d love to see it win.
Who Might Win: The Imitation Game. No reason here, just thought the writing was better than American Sniper and Theory of Everything.
Original Screenplay
Who Will Win: Birdman. Hollywood loves sucking its own dick.
Who Should Win: The Grand Budapest Hotel. It’s sharp, it’s witty, it’s A-OK.
Who Might Win: Boyhood. This thing may sweep every category it’s in.
There you have it. The categories I didn’t vote on here are ones I don’t care about. Each year there are some movies that are nominated a ton and don’t take home anything. That movie this year will be The Imitation Game. Runner up will be The Theory of Everything. Both good movies, both worthy of nominations, but both likely won’t win shit. Boyhood and Birdman will bring home the most, but neither will sweep every category their nominated in (neither are Titanic, sorry bitches).
Tune in Monday for a post-Oscar BingeCast when Law, Moreno, and Myself get hammered and talk about the winners, the losers, NPH, and what Angelina Jolie was wearing on the red carpet.
Here we go, this will be the last week for any nudity points or magazine points. Sunday night will bring the official end of our inaugural season. All award points and the last box office points will be added at the beginning of next week and we’re out. There’s still room for some positioning (bragging rights) so stay tuned until the end. Said can go down on a collective babadiiick. Hit the link below for the entire spreadsheet or punch the picture below because you lost.
We’re over the hump and headed to the climax of Banshee’s third season. Moreno and Law talk about the slower pace of this episode and try to figure out how everything is going to play out. Such as…. who’s the next major character to die, will the heist take place this season or next, why the daughter sucks so much, and the entire meaning behind who has a beard and who doesn’t. Enter Black Beard. Check it out and get drunk.
While Moreno defects to New York City in order to open his dream project (Taco Muchacho!), Ammon and Law slave away for your entertainment. We got some TV Round-Up featuring Banshee, The Walking Dead, Better Call Saul, and The Slap.
We got our Oscar predictions and hopfuls as we prepare for the big night this Sunday.
We got What Did You Watch with 50 SHADES OF GREY, TOP FIVE, SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS: SPONGE OUT OF WATER, MILIUS, DUMB AND DUMBER TO, and OF MIRACLES AND MEN.
We also rant about Twitter and do other drunk stuff periodically throughout the show. Come drink with us. Now.
Happy Valentine’s Day weekend everyone. I hope all of you are enjoying a nice weekend and were lucky enough not to waste your hard earned money on Fifty Shades of Grey. I know I didn’t, won’t, and wouldn’t ever make any plans to see this ridiculous flick. Seriously folks, don’t you know that you don’t have to drop forty bucks at the theater to watch something like this? You are aware that you can find movies just like this online for free, right? And from the trailer that I saw, the ones online probably have better dialogue too. But hey, if that’s what gets you going, by all means proceed.
But I’m here today to actually talk about good movies. A few weeks ago, I kicked off my Oscar series by talking about some of this year’s nominees and omissions. And just last week, I started a new fan vote that lets you make your choice for who should win each category this year. You’ve still got a week left, so take a few minutes and make your picks HERE.
I know Oscar night isn’t for everyone (check out this week’s Jack Attack Tuesday), but I’m actually a big fan. I know I shouldn’t be, as it’s really just a bunch of rich people celebrating other rich people, but hey, I guess I’m a sucker for things like this. It’s true that the big celebrities get most of the press, but it is nice to see some of the people behind the scenes get their fifteen minutes as well. I’m talking the costume designers, the set designers, the special effects team, and my personal favorite, the writers, get the recognition they so richly deserve. And while guys like me debate on who should win and who will win, the fact remains that somebody’s name eventually comes after the phrase “And the Oscar goes to….”. And this is my favorite part of awards season. People will argue forever about how this movie should have beaten that movie and this actor didn’t deserve that, but we never turn away from the speeches, even if we disagree with the outcome.
So the plan today is to just give you a few of the best acceptance speeches that I’ve seen since I’ve really started paying attention to the Oscars. But before I do that, I want to start with one that happened before I was even born. It’s perhaps the most controversial speech in Oscar history. In 1973, Marlon Brando was nominated for his work in The Godfather. But the night before the ceremony, he announced he would boycott the show due to the treatment of Native Americans in film. When his name was called the next night as the winner, young actress Sacheen Littlefeather would take his place on the podium, refuse the award, and read a statement that Brando had prepared.
JOE PESCI-GOODFELLAS
It doesn’t get much simpler than this.
JACK PALANCE-CITY SLICKERS
This might be the funniest one on my list. But hey, it’s normal for a man in his 70s to do one-armed pushups on national television in a tuxedo, right?
TOM HANKS-PHILADELPHIA
Longtime funnyman Tom Hanks shows everyone that he’s one of the best actors in the world with this performance. Seriously, if you haven’t seen this movie, you’re missing out. And his acceptance speech is almost just as good. Okay, that might be a stretch, but it’s pretty damn good.
CUBA GOODING JR.– JERRY MAGUIRE
At that time, I don’t think I’d ever seen anybody so excited to win. But just wait a couple spots and you’ll see one that might beat it. But still, this was a very good speech for a very good performance.
ROBIN WILLIAMS-GOOD WILL HUNTING
I almost didn’t put this one on here, as I don’t have much respect for people who commit suicide, but I couldn’t resist as this is one of the best performances I’ve ever seen.
BEN AFFLECK & MATT DAMON-GOOD WILL HUNTING
This was a very cool moment. At this time, these two were not the Hollywood heavyweights they are today. They were two young guys that had a dream and worked their ass off to achieve it.
ROBERTO BENIGNI-LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL
This is what the Oscars are all about. As the director, Benigni would accept the Oscar for Best Foreign Language Film, which is what the clip below shows you. He would also win later in the night for Best Actor and delivered another great moment by telling the audience that “I used up all my English”. Great moment here.
ANGELINA JOLIE-GIRL, INTERRUPTED
And the award for the creepiest speech on this list goes to…Mrs. Pitt. Watch your back Brad. She really, really, really likes her brother.
JULIA ROBERTS-ERIN BROCKOVICH
I don’t pretend to be the biggest fan of Julia Roberts, but I really did like her speech when she won for Erin Brockovich. And she certainly earned that Oscar. I’ve obviously never seen the final vote count, but I’m betting that was one of the biggest blowouts in Academy Awards history.
HALLE BERRY-MONSTER’S BALL
Let the tears flow, Halle. In arguably the most emotional acceptance speech on this list, this was truly an amazing moment.
ADRIEN BRODY-THE PIANIST
It’s not even the speech that people remember here, but the moments leading up to it that make this a great Oscar moment. I guess when you’ve got the chance to go for it, just go for it. And that’s what Adrien Brody did when taking the stage to accept his Oscar from presenter Halle Berry. Pimp move brother.
JAMIE FOXX-RAY
If you would have told me that Jamie Foxx was going to win an Academy Award when I was watching In Living Color in the 90s, I would have had you committed. But I’m sure glad he did, because this may be my favorite speech of all time. Just listen to the end of this speech and try not to tear up.
REESE WITHERSPOON-WALK THE LINE
This was just a very nice speech from a great performance.
MARTIN SCORSESE-THE DEPARTED
It’s a crying shame that it took so long for this to happen, but the great thing about Martin Scorsese is that he just went with it, even asking if the envelope was correct. Well deserved after a long, long wait.
DUSTIN LANCE BLACK-MILK
For most, this is a once in a lifetime moment on that stage, and the writer of Milk certainly didn’t waste his opportunity. Some might call his acceptance speech too political, but I call it fantastic.
KATE WINSLET-THE READER
Okay, she didn’t have the wait that Scorsese had, but Kate Winslet had her fair share of disappointment before finally winning for The Reader.
HEATH LEDGER-THE DARK KNIGHT
This was another one I was hesitant to put on here, but there’s no denying that this was a powerful yet tragic moment in Oscar history.
AARON SORKIN-THE SOCIAL NETWORK
I just like Aaron Sorkin and I love the movie. Deal with it.
MERYL STREEP-THE IRON LADY
It’s nearly impossible to talk about the Oscars and not mention Meryl Streep.
CHRISTOPHER PLUMMER-BEGINNERS
“Where have you been all my life?” Classic.
JENNIFER LAWRENCE-SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK
Because it’s my list and she’s just so damn cute.
What’s your favorite Oscar speech? Let me know below or hit me up on Twitter @THElukenorris.
Don’t forget to cast your Oscar votes HERE. I’ll be back next week with the results and my picks for each and every category as we get geared up for Oscar night. Until next time, I leave you with this.
I have nothing specific to talk about here, so I’ll just touch on a few things that have been bouncing around the ol’ noggin.
MARVEL OWNS FILM RIGHTS TO SPIPER-MAN. Is this news? I thought Marvel owned Spider-Man, but apparently I don’t know anything. Sony did and sold the rights of the films (and future films) to Marvel. Good… I guess? I don’t know. I don’t care. What this means to me is… watch for Spider-Man in upcoming Avengers movies and here’s to hopin’ that we don’t have to sit through yet another Spider-Man origin movie. Because eff that.
JON STEWART LEAVING THE DAILY SHOW. This is a bummer, but the guy has been doing it for 16 years. I’d say it’s about time he moved on to bigger and better things. Not sure what is in his future, but I’m thinking he’ll either do more filmmaking like ROSEWATER or he’ll pursue a future in politics. If Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jesse Ventura can hold office, then why not Stewart? He’d be more likely to get shit done and make a difference than either of those meatheads.
TRAILER FOR POLTERGEIST REMAKE. I didn’t watch this and I never will. Fuck this movie. This has nothing to do with “they’re ruining my childhood” or anything like that. The original nailed it and is about as perfect of a haunted house movie as they come. I have no interest to see new filmmakers come in and try to a) re-create it or b) improve upon it, because it will likely c) suck a bunch of babadiiiick! Not all remakes suck, but remakes of brilliant movies never live up to the originals. Never ever.
TRAILER FOR STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON. This trailer, on the other hand, I did watch. And good lord does it look awesome. Not sure how I feel about the car chasing action sequence that shows up in the middle of the trailer, but everything else about it is money. Love the casting, love the music, love the time period, and I can’t wait to see it. Maybe it’s because it’s a music biopic of a group that was big during my lifetime and that I was a big fan of… even if I was only in 5th grade at the time. This isn’t The Doors, this isn’t Johnny Cash, this a group I listened to in a time when I was alive, so color me thrilled. Plus, STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON is one of my favorite albums of all time.
BETTER CALL SAUL. I checked out the first episode because I loved BREAKING BAD. I didn’t like the idea of a spin-off because it makes it sound cheap and it cheapens BREAKING BAD, in a way. So color me surprised when BETTER CALL SAUL was as awesome as it was. Seriously, whoa. Really dug Bob Odenkirk, dug the origin of his name, I’m liking the drama with his older brother and the competing firm, I love his moment of inspiration to get clients in the most shady way possible. Is it as brilliant as BREAKING BAD? No, not yet. But that’s not a bad thing. It’s good. On its own it’s good and I have hopes it will continue to be good. Can’t wait to dive into this season!
THE WALKING DEAD. Moreno and Movie Freak chuckled when I said I was semi-looking forward to the mid-season premier of THE WALKING DEAD. They tapped out long ago. And it looks like they are having the last laugh here, because the mid-season premier sucked a whole truckload of assholes. Seriously, what the hell is going on here? They drove 500 miles to Virginia because that’s what Beth wanted to do? And she died, so they did it for her? What? Then they kill off one of their coolest characters… given, the dude was more of a babysitter than a badass, but still. Seems like a waste. And then he starts seeing Dead People? Ugh. Beth singing songs? Governor giving lectures? Wow. I thought they would return to form, but alas, they made it so much worse. And now they are off to more wandering around on a “mission” to get 100 miles? Eff this show.
Peaches Christ what an episode of Banshee. Once again, the show manages to top itself in action, suspense, writing and Chayton being a complete dick. Law and I try to keep our emotions in check throughout this episode but find it difficult because Beardy keeps showing up and ruining everything. We quickly become BFFs with Nazi guy (Bunker), and wonder why the one chick is turning into a man. Sorry for the vague descriptions, trying to avoid spoilers. Billy Raven sucks.
We’re almost at the end now and I guess it all comes down to where you finished. Said all but has this thing wrapped up unless somebody scores 27 magazine covers next week while getting nude 4 times and wins all the Oscars. Start scouting for next season if you want in. Sign up will be soon. As always, click on the link below for the full spreadsheet or look deep into the eyes of the picture below and pretend it means something.