Tyrant

Two episodes into Tyrant, and I can tell that it’s a show that I’ll be keeping up with throughout the season.  So far, its apparent Godfather undertones, Iranian setting and willingness to blow shit up at the drop of a hat has me intrigued.  The writing seems pretty tight, the kids aren’t annoying and the lead is pretty believable as a guy who has tried everything to keep away from the family business, yet finds himself being pulled right in.  Hey, I told you about the Godfather undertones.  On this week’s Binge Cast, Jim Law mentioned that the show has a Homeland feel to it, and while I agree, it also lends to Law’s racial profiling of anyone who doesn’t use sunscreen less than SPF 450.  I don’t even know what sunscreen is.  I have a general idea of Iran but not much more than that, and as ignorant as it is for me to say this, I’m looking forward to how this story plays out in the country.  I just don’t know much about it.  I can’t watch CNN or Fox for events happening in Iran because they’re biased on both sides, so I’ll take a fake story filmed on a fake Iran set any day.  My time is precious.  I don’t expect this to be the best show ever, but then again, I’m just looking for an entertaining show.  Speaking of “blah blah blah is the best EVER”…..

Superlatives are the worst thing EVER

I have no illusions that I’m the first person to address this annoyance, and doubt I’ll be the last, but someone proclaiming something being the “best” or “worst EVER” is fucking beyond annoying.  Now, I’m not saying I’ve never uttered this phrase, because I have once or twice (just fucking look above), but the habitual use of the phrase is just out of control.  Why can’t we just enjoy or dislike something without someone else proclaiming that it’s “the best thing or worst thing ever”?  Why does it have to be either side of the spectrum?  Can’t something be entertaining, or even bad, without it being the best or worst ever?  I get that it’s part of internet language, but I feel like it’s a cop out for people who either don’t have the communication skills to discuss it, or just don’t feel like it, so they feel the superlative covers it.

Over the last few months, I proclaimed my love for FX’s Fargo, and as such, would seek out articles, recaps, and other op eds that talked about one of my favorite shows of the year so far.  And in the comments section of the articles and social media, it’s one of three things:  A)  It’s not True Detective.  B) It is/is not the best ever.  3)  Billy Bob’s hair is the worst ever.  No explanation or reason.  Just these threads chock full of shitheads with shit in their shit mouths who know nothing but to use an autotext, impulsive shit response from their shit mouths to say what they’re feeling.  Which is, “I need to pick one of two things to say because my dumb face area can’t think of anything beyond that.”

Not to change the subject but since we’re on the subject, I also get annoyed when you talk about a movie, show, or musical artist and someone immediately goes, “well, (blank blank) is better than that”, because it’s utter bullshit.  You’re not looking to discuss anything, you’re just looking to champion whatever you’re trying to get across without acknowledging what I’m saying.  You’re not interested or probably don’t have the capacity to have a discussion on the points of why you think something is better.  It’s like coming over to my house for pizza, shitting on it, then presenting YOUR pizza and going, “yo, this is better.”  It’s fucking not.  Shut up.  And stop shitting on my pizza. I fucking love pizza and I especially love pizza when it doesn’t have shit on it.  It’s annoying.  We are seriously, 40 days away from “Ow My Balls.”  And while part of me can’t wait to see that show nightly, the other part of me thinks people are the worst fucking thing ever.

And I thought True Detective was no Fargo.

The Vinyl Predicament

Goddammit.  That’s what I say every goddamn time I want a piece of hard media.  I’ve stopped buying DVDs and Blu-rays for at least 5 years now, and I seriously can’t tell you the last time I bought a music CD.  I don’t even know what happened to my CDs, though I’m pretty sure I lost them in a fire (i.e. breakup).  But Goddammit if I don’t want me some vinyl.  Here’s my problem with vinyl which isn’t so much a problem as it’s a predicament.  I just don’t want to start my music collection over again.  I spent so much fucking money buying tapes as a kid, then CDs, then digital downloads.  Then stereo equipment.  Do I really want to fork over the money for records?  And equipment ?  If I’m getting vinyl, I’m buying 2 turntables and a microphone to really set it off.  Seriously.  I know you don’t have to have a top of the line record player, but I grew up with an uncle who was a DJ in the Chicago House scene of the 80s, so I know the difference in quality when it comes to vinyl.  I’ve read enough biographies, seen enough documentaries, and heard plenty of music producer interviews to know that when they produce a record, they’re producing it for the experience of a person listening to it on a high quality sound system.  There are layers and intricacies and subtleties.  There’s a method and artistry to producing and mixing a record that you’re just not going to get or appreciate listening through a pair of earbuds or Beats or via Spotify or Pandora.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I love Spotify.  LOVE Spotify.  It’s the one music service that has kept me up to date with music and allows me to go back and discover shit that I missed along the way.  But I know I’m not getting the highest quality listening experience that is available to me.  So, again, do I really want to fork over money for records?  I have nothing against vinyl collectors, and appreciate their dedication to a media that offers an auditory experience, I just don’t know if I want/need/have to give myself over to it.  Because I know, me being me, collecting vinyl would be a rabbit hole that would likely cut into my drinking budget.

And that’s a problem a goddamn gentleman can’t have.