Binge Media Sports: The Revisit-Major League
“Who are these fucking guys?”
Well, janitor from Scrubs (yes, that’s him), I’ll tell you. This group comprises the cast of a movie about as far away from Field of Dreams as you can get. As we did earlier this week with the beloved Costner classic, we take a look back at Major League as the celebration of the April of 1989 rolls on. Okay, so I missed the actual 25th Anniversary by a couple of weeks (April 7th, 1989 was the original release date), but Binge Media Sports didn’t even exist a few weeks ago, so I’m sure you’ll cut me some slack.
Over the years, Major League has become one of the most popular and certainly most quoted baseball movies of all time, and for good reason. Honestly, how many times has your beer mug been empty and you look at your buddy and tell him that “Jobu needs a refill”? Surely, if you’re reading this, you know the story. A stripper takes over the lowly Cleveland Indians after her owner husband dies and she plots to make sure the team is awful enough to knock attendance low enough that she can move the team to Miami (remember, this is 1989 so the Marlins didn’t exist yet). She invites has-beens and young guys nobody has heard of to spring training, along with a manager with no big league experience, assuring that the Tribe will finish dead last. But what she doesn’t count on is the guys banding together to spite her and wins the big game. Hooray! Of course, we all see it coming but the ride we’re taken on to get there is absolutely hysterical, and with so many characters, we’re given so many subplots.
There’s the story of Jake Taylor and his one remaining shot in the bigs. But he also has bad knees and an ex-girlfriend problem. Pedro Cerrano has defected from Cuba (hopefully he didn’t have anyone after him like the problem Yasiel Puig is having) and is into voodoo, which becomes a problem for veteran pitcher Eddie Harris. And he can’t hit a curveball. Willie Mays Hayes wasn’t even invited to camp, but can run fast enough in his pajamas to earn a spot (if only Wesley Snipes could outrun the IRS).
Then there’s Roger Dorn, a rich boy who can still hit the ball pretty well, but can’t field for shit, which ends up costing him 40 sit-ups per error. In one of my favorite parts of the movie, as Dorn presents manager Lou Brown with his contract telling him that he doesn’t have to do any exercise he doesn’t feel is necessary, Lou just throws it down and pisses on it.
But Dorn’s biggest problem really isn’t his fielding. It’s with young fireballer Ricky “Wild Thing” Vaughn, fresh from the California Penal League. Rick’s problems run deep. Not only is he a criminal, but he’s struggling with control issues, temper issues, and the fact that he can’t see very well. Before he puts everything together towards the end, he certainly brings us some of the best moments in the movie. “You want me to drag him outta here, kick the shit out of him?” A lot of his funny moments come when he doesn’t even talk. Think his wardrobe in the restaurant or him pitching to the dummy or this:
And through all the hilarity and quotes, everything gets fixed. Jake gets back together with Lynn. Willie makes a name for himself through great running and outfield play. Dorn somehow becomes Mike Schmidt. Sure, his wife sleeps with Charlie Sheen, but hasn’t that happened to everyone? Cerrano and Harris bury the hatchet and Pedro crushes a curveball to tie the game in the big finale. And Rick Vaughn overcomes everything, including his bad luck with the Yankees, to get the big strikeout.
There’s a character I’ve yet to mention and he happens to be my personal favorite. Through all of the ups and downs of the movie, there’s one guy who constantly kept me laughing. His one-liners and overall description of the baseball action really put an exclamation point on an already hilarious flick, and that’s Harry Doyle, played to perfection by Mr. Bob Uecker.
It’s been nearly impossible to watch a game over the past quarter century and not at least once say “Juuust a bit outside”, and his interaction with young broadcaster Monty is brilliant. The great thing about this is that Uecker was initially cast for his work in old Miller Lite ads and Mr. Belvedere. It wasn’t until he got the job that the director found out that he had been calling games for the Milwaukee Brewers for nearly two decades, a job he still holds to this very day.
Major League has certainly become a different kind of baseball classic in the eyes of millions of people. It continuously ranks in the top 5 in most baseball movie polls. Believe me, I almost just took this revisit to list every single funny line from the movie, but that would have been a long list. So if you’d like to tell me what your favorite is, just punch it into the comments section below or just follow me and tweet @THElukenorris with your pick. Then grab a drink and throw in Major League. Just make sure not to steal Jobu’s rum. You know how that turns out. It’s very bad.
Now for the fun part. Hopefully, you’ve enjoyed the revisits of Field of Dreams and this one of Major League as part of a week long Binge Media Sports event. Check back in with us tomorrow for a new and exciting vote, which will impact the final article in the look back at these two great films.