The Re-Visit: Robin Hood: Men in Tights

I’ve seen this film only once, way back in 1993 on it’s opening weekend. My anticipation level was high as I was a big fan of SPACEBALLS and all it’s giggle-inducing greatness. However, I was a silly child/fanboy upon the release of SPACEBALLS and STAR WARS jokes were “my shit”. By the time MEN IN TIGHTS came out I was a slightly more mature young man. Getting to the point, I fucking hated this movie. I’ve stayed away from it all these years because of the shitty taste it left me with. But ever since we started this column it’s been at the top of my list to give another shot. Were the jokes over my head? Was I just a teenage douchebag that felt the humor was below me? Is Richard Lewis really that awful? Let’s find out.

It’s to note that the last time I re-visited SPACEBALLS I found it a smidgen above deflating. This is going to be ugly.

This movie is so painfully unfunny that I’m considering taking time off due to depression. It’s hard to believe this film was made in the 90s as the comedy plays like an episode of ‘Leave it to Beaver’, only dumber. The devastatingly obvious set-ups for the jokes here are embarrassing to say the least. Some of them take so long to get to the punchline you have time to roll your eyes so far back into your head they come all the way around and you get to start over.

Here’s a drinking game (of sorts) to play while watching this film.

• Every time somebody breaks the fourth wall and gets smug with the camera – punch yourself in the face.
• Every time there’s an elaborate blind-guy gag – slam your nuts in a drawer.
• Every time somebody say “Bless you.” when they hear Dave Chapelle’s character name (Achoo) – light a small section of your body on fire.
• Every time there’s a gay joke – cut yourself.

I’d go on but you’ll be dead before the end of the first act. Fun. But hold the phone! Here comes director, Mel Brooks, as a super Jewish guy. That’s still gotta get some laughs, right? Or maybe it’s Dom DeLuise doing the GODFATHER impersonation. The Reebok pumps joke? The Arsenio Hall dog pound reference? All of it is so delightfully unoriginal and as subtle as explosive diarrhea in church.

Richard Lewis delivers every one of his lines like he’s waiting for a laugh track. The song and dance numbers are so forced that even Seth MacFarlane would be offended. Dave Chapelle is nothing more than one long black-guy joke.

I truly went into this with an open mind. I didn’t want 19-year-old me to be right about anything (I hate that guy). Sadly, I think this re-visit did more harm than good.

Grade: 3/10